Snapping Back into Reality

Lately, I have been having the strong urge to fill you guys in on my personal thoughts. Like why I haven't found someone special or feel like I have enough friends. However I tell myself: "No, These people do not need to know anything" I do have enough time in the day to let my mind just wander and think about what could have been and where I could have been. But I can tell you guys these things because hey, some people might feel the same way right?

The reality of things are that everything is harder than it seems, well maybe except for playing soccer or video games. Being as observant as I am, most people I know do not have much trouble doing anything. Being able to do anything they want, going on trips, finding almost any lady they can have, and just plain getting what they want. No jealously (well a little bit, I can't lie) but sometimes one has to make their own luck to get everything they wish for. I might have to work very very hard for luck to come my way. It isn't as if others don't but maybe I am not smart enough to have everything come to me.

I have always wanted the asshole gene. Sometimes I am too nice even if I am treated like shit. I want to just have that gene that just don't worry about those people instead of bringing them back in. I think that maybe they wouldn't be my friend if I ignored them so I say, "sorry" and let them hang out with me. I don't know what exactly can I do. Should I risk having no friends and being true to myself and not being gullible to those around me? or should I just do the same thing I've been doing and risk being hurt? The decision might be made for me. I might just have a moment where I might just snap and start just worrying about myself no matter how things work out.

My fantasy world is done and dusted. Just cause I think people like me, it doesn't mean that it is true. Snap back into Reality Dre, It's hard to trust many people these days...

The State of African Football

I was actually thinking about this post for a while. Especially after seeing Nigeria and Cameroon basically bowing out in the first round. And Ghana, more than likely, being the only African representative left in this tournament. However there were a couple of respectable managers who beat me to the punch of why African Football is so close but yet so far.

When there are players like Michael Essien, Didier Drogba, and Samuel Eto'o, you wonder why exactly has there not been an African team who hasn't won the World Cup. Roger Milla from Cameroon was one of the first in 1990 to break through and make it to the Quarterfinals, but other than that and Senegal and in 2002, no team has broken through and made it into the Semifinals or Finals. Even an South Korea, from Asia, has made an semifinals. You have to think why haven't these talented players have yet to make it until the pinnacle of World soccer

Well there is hardly any stability in the African game. I watched ESPN's coverage of the World Cup and Ruud Gullit made a great point in saying that many of the African teams have a manager who have been with the team for only three months except for the Algerian team. And that isn't enough time to establish your values and tactics on a team. Cameroon and Ivory Coast are made examples. Paul Le Guen and Sven Goran Erikson didn't have a chance because these players have been use to a certain manager but then when they come into this situation and try to install their system, the players can't get use to it like that. And then the managers turn it like this: "okay, they aren't going to win anyways, let's collect the paycheck and go on with our business" And that is exactly what's happening right now. Most of these teams aren't going to make it out of the first round and the coaches are leaving out top players because they don't "fit their system"

The important thing that is keeping African football back is their discipline. How many times have u seen from an African keeper bad goalkeeping? Or a rash tackle that shouldn't be made? Or opportunities that they should have put away but they did not? Ghana isn't much organized and discipline as the other teams, they just benefited from the other teams mistakes. (They have only scored two goals this World Cup and both have been PKs) You can see the skill from these players, they know how to play football. However they still make those mistakes that makes you scratch their heads and the goalkeepers are basically amateur goalies trying to impersonate pros. Until all these players receive the right training, they will still continue to falter when you think they should be better.

I don't think that the continent of Africa needs to do a lot of work. All they need to do is stick with a manager no matter if it is good or bad. Tweak the way they are learning these kids how to play football so they can be the best possible footballers they can be. And just relax and play football bc they do know how to play the game, it's just a matter if they can play it effectively...

Let's Go boys!!!!

For once, millions and millions around this country will be watching this game at pubs, in their houses, or at work. And if work won't let you watch the game, then they will be receiving text messages or constant updates.

We still probably won't be a soccer nation but we don't want this love affair to end just yet, especially with our come from behind tie (should have been a victory) against Slovenia. Even people who I know don't support soccer are finding places to watch the game. You would have not found such energy in 2006 or even in 2002 when we made it to the Quarterfinals.

We face Algeria in just under two hours. We need all of the support we can get. Hopefully Bob Bradley doesn't get the tactics wrong nor do we under-estimate our opponents. Algeria will be a decent team and if you can hold England to a nil-nil draw then you are doing well for yourself.

So everyone get your National Team jerseys/ shirts, paint yourself red/white/and blue, get your chants ready, and hopefully be ready to enjoy the next two hours because whether you think so or not. The boys need every single one of us more now than ever...

The FFF has got this all wrong

(The bold is the added part of this original piece and probably the biggest reason why everything in France has went to shit)

If you have been living under a rock and not paying any attention to what is going on in the World Cup, you would know that the French national team is on the brink of anarchy (if it hasn't hit that point yet).

They've tied and lost their first two games between Uruguay and Mexico respectively. And they haven't even had a sniff on goal. With that Nicolas Anelka was axed from the side because of a tirade between him and their outgoing manager Raymond Domenech.

Yesterday, the team refused to train because of the decision to send Anelka home which caused Technical Directors to quit and fitness trainers to question the French players committment. Along with other in-fighting like William Gallas being jealous of Patrice Evra being captain. Franck Ribery and Yoann Gourcuff going at it in an airplane. And leading players not passing the ball to other teammates and campaigning other players to play.

One would think after hearing all this that all the blame would be shouldered on the players. However the whole Federation at large has to have some blame in this instance. With their handling of a manager that the players don't respect and the fact that they have already named a new manager after this tournament. They have got this all wrong.

I have said this hundreds and hundreds of times. How Raymond Domenech has kept his job this long is a mystery to me? He has not shown any of the qualities of a manager who knows what he is doing. And during matches, he looks like a statue. When there are managers like Diego Maradona, who looks like a cheerleader out there but still is getting his team into the second round of this tournament. There should be no reason why a team laden with talent should not be able to do the same.

I understand that after the 06 World Cup that he had "earned" (even though I think they got to that final in spite of Domenech) the right to carry his team into the Euro 2008 tournament. I believe that is when everything unraveled for this once proud footballing country. That is where constant in-fighting was a regular and they stumbled out of the tournament not even making it out of the first round. They could not even get a win against Romania who were suppose to be the whipping boys of the tournament.

In any proud, important footballing country, that would have been the end of Raymond Domenech's reign as manager. However I don't know whether they were trying to groom Laurent Blanc to the post or what but they decided to give this crackpot manager another two years. He has already lost the respect of his players at this point and the team was always in constant turmoil. Bringing in a manager like Paul Le Guen or Gerard Houllier would have at least brought some sibilance of stability. But no, the French Federation felt like they had their man who was going to do the job.

They stumbled through World Cup qualifying and in fact needed to go into a playoff to win the spot in the World Cup. Of course then the handball around the world happened that got France through when they probably should not have gotten them through.

Understandable once you get into the World Cup tournament that you should not fire your manager unless there are unreconciled differences. But when players openly challenged his rule a couple of months before the biggest tournament of the world. Domenech stumbling along for the last four years. We have to pin some of the blame on French Football.

Then you strip Thierry Henry of his captain's armband and only give him a limited role on the side. We know that he isn't at his prime anymore but he is the only one that can lift this team. I think most players on that team love and respect Henry. And stripping a legend of the French game his captainacy shows the rest of the squad that you do not know what you're doing and you do not care about the morale of the rest of the team. Domenech and the higher ups should have at least rewarded him for getting them here. Remember he did set-up the controversial goal.

Now you have to choose a new captain. And you should know that everyone thinks that they should be the captain of the team. The only one that you can bring an united front with is the captain you just stripped. So whomever they chose as captain wouldn't be everyone's choice and probably would not be ready for this responsibility with just a month left before their tournament started. So of course let's just put Patrice Evra into the firing lines further upsetting William Gallas because after Henry he probably feels like he should be captain of this team but there is no one in that starting lineup that deserves the armband.

And when it couldn't get worse, they decided to name Laurent Blanc the manager of the French National Team after the World Cup. Now this isn't a shot against Blanc, actually I am glad he is going to be manager. However when you name a new manager before the World Cup starts it is never going to end well.

You would think that players should love to play for their country in a World Cup because they may never get a chance to play for one again. It won't work when players hate their manager, players hate each other, and players hate the federation that they are playing for because they have treated them like shit for four years since great Zidane left the side. They might regret this later but they aren't going to play for a man who they know is going to be gone after this Tuesday's game (I am predicting them go by the waste side against South Africa). They have not played for him ever since the 06 World Cup so what makes anyone to think that they would play for him now?

Now we go to Patrice Evra's claim that there is a traitor amongst the ranks. I believe that even though these players do not like each other. They have a mutual hate for the French Football Federation and their manager so when Nicolas Anelka left they were quite sad and disappointed that such information was leaked out to the media. And I have a feeling that they know a player wouldn't do that to another player so they looked right at the FFF who hasn't been kind to the players any this tournament and has been criticizing them the whole way through. So it is no wonder that they didn't train on Sunday. They did not do that to the manager because if that was the case they wouldn't have been training at all this tournament, they were sticking it to the whole Federation for get ridding one of their fellow teammates.

They will show up on the field on Tuesday against South Africa physically but will they be there mentally I have no clue. However one thing is for certain, we will be watching this train-wrecked finally go off the cliff...

My (Monotonous) Life

First and foremost, Happy Fathers Day to my Dad and all the other Pops out there. We appreciate your hard work and dedication to your families.



This Saturday more than any other Saturday basically is basically a highlight of my current life. First, I went out to Rose High School and did some sport specific conditioning work with the kids for about two hours. Then for about 12 hours after that, I was basically nowhere to be seen from the entire world. I closed myself in my room and just watched the soccer games and basically hung out in my room.

I was not grounded or not in trouble. I just felt the need to close myself from the world at large. I feel like I try too hard to get involved with people's lives. And that most other people (there are definitely exceptions) that could care less and not even going to bother to say hi or talk to me for that matter.

So I decided it was a good idea to close my computer. Sit in my favorite couch and watch tv. It actually felt pretty good for some reason. I did not feel any obligation to say anything to anyone nor did I feel antsy about getting on my computer or on the phone and say what's up.

I wouldn't say that I would like to do this sort of thing everyday but it would be very nice for a change to not feel the dependency of talking to people and enjoy the monotonous life that I am having at the moment. Especially when during the week, I am either working or playing pick-up soccer with some friends. It's nice to sit back, relax, kick-back, and enjoy the finer things. I remember when I use to do so when I was younger. I think it would be nice to get back to those things and not worry about the uncontrollable...

Just Rambling Away

I have been staring at this blank screen for a good 15 minutes. I wanted to type a post about my search for a mate. However I've got nothing. Cannot say whether it is a sign. Whether I have a clue or do I really need to talk about this at the time. I'm only 24 years of age. I've got ample time. I guess. So now I just want to talk and ask myself questions because who reads this junk that my hands type on a keyboard?

I haven't been alone recently however I have found myself lonely whether with company or without it. I tend to draw myself away from people. I haven't gotten why I necessarily do this. Do I like people? Why can't I get along with some people? I am the sort of person who can be awkward around people if I have just met them. Once I get to know them and become comfortable with them then the awkwardness eventually goes away. Many don't let me get to that point and dissociate with me within the next couple of days or so. It is okay. The more I know about those kinds of people the less likelihood that I would talk to them anyways. I guess that could potentially answer some of those questions. Sometimes I also tried to force myself upon wanting to talk and it doesn't work that way. So I've laid off on those type of things and now taking everything for what it is. I'm going to be here and ready to listen to whatever you have to say.

I have looked at my facebook wall and just seen those stumbleupon sites that I've decided to post. No one writing on my wall or answering back to messages that I sent. I usually get bent out of shape at that point. Why don't people say hello or how have you been? Now it's just been whatever. People are busy with their lives and they don't want to talk to me or they do not have any time to talk. It is no problem to me anymore. I can take the loneliness. At dozes.


I've enjoyed hanging out with these guys from Greenville lately. It is more because we all have the same interests so it is quite easy to get along with these type of people. I like to play footy, we enjoy a good beer pong game, and we like to party. What more can you ask for really? It's good. I'm going to enjoy being back here for the next couple of weeks, playing pick-up and hanging out.

I am going to move to Raleigh in July and I'll probably be in a situation where I am going to be a hermit except for when I go to work. I know people in Raleigh but I don't know people in Raleigh. I don't think they'd be comfortable with me asking them whether they want coffee or not. Why I say that? Because I've already tried it a couple of times. Fail! So I have to figure out other ways to meet new people around there. Like I've said before in this blog that it isn't easy for me to go up to a random strangers and start talking to them. I don't know whether I need to do that or whether I need to start looking for clubs and other interests groups and start meeting people that way.

I've been rambling for a good 20 minutes around and most of it probably doesn't have any substances. It isn't one of those drunk post or anything, I haven't been able to get any sleep. Well only about two hours of sleep actually.

Well any-who, I hope to start meeting people soon. If it happens great, if not it won't be a lost cause. I can always walk to the beat of my own drum...

I'm Looking At Me. Not You Anymore!

I've been hearing the constant calls for me to do something for someone else. Whether it is a broken contract (which I'm not all the way responsible for) or e-mail a person who obviously isn't going to listen to what I am going to say. Also I hear other voices telling me to do this and do that, and where are you going to be in the next five to ten years.

Quite frankly, I just don't know. It has been a month since I got back into the country and I am not going to lie, I wanted for the first few weeks just to relax, unwind and enjoy being with my friends and family because I was dealing with a lot of effed up ish back "yander".

Now that I am refreshed and ready to get going again. I am focusing on me now. I have always cared for others and tried to take care of them and talk them through things. However it is time for me to be a bit greedy with myself. Start developing a bit of cold-hearted spirit.

I am not saying I won't care for my friends because I will always care for them and have them in my hearts. All I am saying is that I need to be much more worried about me and not then because for the most part, they have their things in order. I need to get on their level in terms of having a steady life because it's been pretty crazy for me since I graduated. What I am saying is that the general focus will be on me and I will do everything in my power to make sure that I make something out of myself.

So for those that know me well, you get the same nice, caring, but sarcastic guy that you are use to getting however to those who can care less and want to cheat me (or has cheated me out of things) you are more than likely dead to me.

No matter what empty threats you throw at me, my house is going to be strong and I'm not going to let you just throw stones at it...