Alright, I've sat here for about two hours trying to free-write about things in my head. I decided to put on some music while I do this.
I went into work today. To say the least I wasn't feeling too well so I would try to "Do Less" for most of the day. It really didn't work too well as I was doing more than I thought. Fortunately everything went without a hitch. I did my copy jobs, print jobs, picked up the mail and dropped off that junk. I felt better as the day went along, I had to stop what I was doing at times just to keep me from feeling badly.
We have this motto for the new year since we are basically customer service reps (in disguise). I will try not complain about the small things that people can do for themselves but make us do. It is hard and you think that people are lazy however we all have to get on with our business because guess what? if they did everything themselves then what would we need to be used for?
My brain hasn't been working as I use to like it. It is not as if I haven't thought of anything. Everything has been random and scrambled thoughts. I cannot piece things together. I feel as my IQ is getting smaller and smaller as the days go by while I do my mindless work that I've been accustomed to. So I made one resolution to go back to school this year. I do not know which graduate courses I will take, hopefully that comes to me in the near future.
Second Resolution is something that I've been trying to do for a while now. Trying not to be upset that I am alone. Most if not all of my friends are in some relationship or another and I am usually the oddball in the group. There is no jealously on my part, I just think sometimes what is wrong with me? And of course with Alcohol involved, one gets angry. So I'm going to try to avoid needlessly getting angry.
Third Resolution: Just playing more soccer whenever I get the chance. It doesn't matter what it is. I have pretty much conceded the fact that I won't be playing professional soccer ever. That is cool with me and I am satisfied with what I have done. I went to New Zealand and almost won a national championship. I wish things would have worked out more over there but things happen for a reason and I am back here because I was brought back here for some reason or another. Alright that isn't the point, I just want to keep on playing because it has been the only thing that has ever brought me joy. Since I was a little kid playing, it has brought me. It has been the only constant in my life. Whenever I am not happy about something, I play the game that I love and my happiness comes back to me. It'll never go away.
Other resolutions that I have, I won't tell anybody because it is a bit embarrassing and too personal for this posting even though I am a personal guy myself.
I am not changing though. I will wear my pride on my shoulders and I will say what I am feeling if that is needed. So Happy New Years to everybody and I hope you stick to your resolutions. I will just continue in my mission of becoming a Martian. (I am looking to build a spaceship)
A bit of randomness never hurts.
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